In a press release from Family First she says when she appeared before the committee on December 10 those who appeared before her were all in support of the bill, and were treated well, but when her name was called the mood changed.

"The heavy air was charged with emotion and I am still astounded that I managed to walk towards that table and chair despite apprehension and feeling sick at heart at my different treatment and the apparent hostility," she said.

Carroll said in the middle of her speech, acting chair Chris Auchinvole got up to get a drink, and when she finished her speech with the words of Martin Luther King Jr, Hague was "unsavoury and menacing" to her, calling her homophobic.

"The whole experience was very strange. There was a lack of common courtesy and respect," she said.

Auchinvole said it was common for committee members to get drinks and go to the toilet during submissions as long as a quorum was maintained and that Carroll had already made a written submission to which she was speaking.

He said appearing before a select committee "can be an intimidating experience if you were too sensitive" but members went to great lengths to make people feel relaxed.

He said Carroll was "very direct" and "passionate" in delivering her submission.

"Lots of people were emotional but it's an emotional topic," he said.

Hague said he felt all submitters - especially individuals - had been treated with respect. He said he would be concerned if an 18-year-old felt bullied, but he didn't think that was the case. However, he admitted he did express exasperation when she began talking about "virtue".

"That makes my hackles rise . . . I find it offensive," he said.

"Even more outrageous is her quoting Martin Luther King at the end. I am certain that my feelings would have been obvious at the time: co-opting words from the leader of the American civil rights movement, whose widow has been a vocal advocate of marriage equality, to deny civil rights to others is going to stir strong reactions."

Hague said he never used the word homophobic.

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• Stuff.co.nz
• Image: New Zealand Listener

Family First, which launched the Protect Marriage website, says after being alerted by media that the website was down, it was informed by its webhost company that the domain was experiencing a large scale denial of service attack.

A denial-of-service attack is an attempt to make a network resource unavailable to its intended users. The means used to carry out DoS attack may vary, but they generally consist of the efforts of one or more people to temporarily or indefinitely interrupt or suspend services of a host connected to the Internet.

The company hosting the Protect Marriage website tried blocking the IP addresses associated with the attack but by late afternoon a notice was posted on the website saying "Due to large scale Denial of Service attacks against this domain it has been decided to ensure the stability and security of our servers and network so this account has been removed."

Protectmarriage.org.nz offered resources and information about marriage. Visitors to the site were invited to sign a petition if they "support the definition of marriage being maintained as one man one woman" and oppose any attempt to redefine this.

Before it crashed bogus names had been added to the online petition gathering support for opposition to the Definition of Marriage Bill. Among the names listed were rappers Marshall Mathers (Eminem) and Curtis Jackson (50 Cent), Tobias Fünke (a sexually-confused character from TV show Arrested Development), "Nosy, Homophobic People Intruding on others lives", and Micky and Minnie Mouse.

The band Train was yesterday informed via Twitter that the video for their song Marry Me had been used on protectmarriage.org.nz and responded by saying "Didn't know. Getting it off asap. Thx 4 tip."

Bishop Patrick Dunn of Auckland has appealed "to our lawmakers to keep marriage as defined as between a man and a woman particularly in light of the fact that other legal avenues exist for same sex couples to publicly cement their lifelong commitment to each other."

He said the Catholic Church affirms love, fidelity and commitment in all relationships, but believes that marriage should be defined as being between a man and a woman.

"To propose any alternative definition would have implications in law, and in society, but also for education and the family structure which throughout history has been seen as the fundamental unit in every society."

The Definition of Marriage Bill, a private member's bill proposed by Labour MP Louisa Wall, was selected by ballot last week. It will be debated by parliament in August.

Wall says many members of the gay community simply want the same rights and access to marriage that any other New Zealander has.

"I think this is a generational issue, to be honest," Wall says, "because 63% of New Zealanders support same-sex marriage but in the 18-to-24-year-old age group nearly 80% support it - so this is a bit of a challenge for those not Generation X-Y."

She says her bill modernises the concept of marriage, and if it is passed, same-sex married couples will also be legally able to adopt children.

At present, marriage is not defined in the Marriage Act, and Ms Wall's bill would make it clear that marriage is a union of two people, "regardless of their sex, sexual orientation or gender identity".

The bill would be decided by a conscience vote instead of along party lines.

According to a survey by TV ONE's Close Up, the bill has the definite support of 42 MPs, and needs 61 votes to pass.

Prime Minister John Key earlier signalled his support for the bill in its early stages, but he has moved on to say said he was unlikely to change his mind over the course of the debate to allow same-sex couples to marry - given it was a conscience vote.

"There will be plenty of people in our caucus who will be deeply opposed - particularly the very religious ones, and I can understand that," he said.

"I think it's quite healthy that New Zealand has the debate, I suspect it won't be what it was when you looked at homosexual law reform in the'70s - I don't think it will be that dramatic."

Mr Key said the bill was likely to reach select committee stage and he thought there would be a lot of lobbying from those opposed and those in support of the bill.

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